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Jasini KC's avatar

An exchange of critiques with @Von (and why didn't that highlight?).

1. Have you considered adding Previous/Next buttons to your posts? It took me a while to figure out where to go next.

2. Your language style strikes me as being rather archaic/formal, which is one of the reasons that I think of you stories as being "Regency Romance! IN SPAAACCEE!!!. As well as being a story about varying manners.

3. Even so, the continued use of the word "lasses" tends to throw me out of the story. It is not a word that comes up frequently in my reading. An occasional use in dialogue would be fine.

4. Maybe say what "Article 17" is early on so that we know what it is before the girls start talking about it.

5. My, these are an obnoxious lot of prigs, aren't they?

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